Valentine Onnas
by Alia Lowe
Summary: Wufei receives an interesting e-mail and learns a thing or two about women. Please review and tell me if I should write a sequel to this.


Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing. Even though torturing Wufei does happen to be one of my favorite hobbies, I return him safe and sound ever time I do, well sort of.........  
  
I also do not own this chain letter. It was originally sent to me in January from my friend Div. If you started this letter, please tell me so and I will give you credit. The e-mail has not been changed in any way except by putting it in italics and by changing the subject title.  
Valentine Onnas  
Wufei was quietly sitting in front of his computer at the Preventer's Headquarters one day. Well, as quiet as it usually got around the office. It was Valentine's Day and all of the women in the office were giggling more than usual. Many of them wore frilly red shirts and were handing out enough candy hearts and chocolates to rot all your teeth in one day.  
  
Wufei had to fight off a swarm of them when he attempted to go back to his office after spending an uneventful lunch hour in the cafeteria. The onnas kept offering him candy and other sweets. They just wouldn't take 'no' for an answer!  
  
"Stupid Onnas," Wufei muttered to himself when he finally made it back to his computer safely.  
  
Things were going smoothly as Wufei worked on a document for the next half an hour. He was stirred out of his quiet concentration by the irritating noise that would drive anyone mad.  
  
"You've Got Mail"  
  
Wufei reluctantly clicked on the flashing icon, fully expecting either some junk mail or a prank from Maxwell. To his surprise, it was from Sally Poe. He opened it without hesitation without looking at the subject.  
  
It read:  
WOMEN  
They smile when they want to scream.  
They sing when they want to cry.  
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.  
They fight for what they believe in.   
They stand up for injustice.   
  
Wufei snorted.  
  
They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.  
They go without new shoes so their children can have them.  
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.   
They love unconditionally.   
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.  
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a new marriage.   
Their hearts break when a friend dies.   
They have sorrow at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.   
  
Wufei's eyes softened for a moment before reading on.  
  
They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.   
Women come in all SIZES, in all colors and shapes.   
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.   
The heart of a woman is what makes the world spin!  
Women do more than just give birth.  
They bring joy and hope.  
They give compassion and ideals.  
They give moral support to their family and friends.  
Women have a lot to say and a lot to give.   
This has been sent to you from someone who respects you as a woman. Pass it along to your woman friends to remind them how amazing they are............  
  
Wufei widened his eyes. 'What the.........!? I'm not an onna! This must be some kind of mistake!'  
  
IT'S BEAUTIFUL WOMEN MONTH!   
IT'S GOOD TO BE THE WOMAN  
We got off the Titanic first.   
We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.  
  
Wufei started blushing and reached for a tissue.  
  
Taxis stop for us.   
We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.   
No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival The Speedo.   
  
Wufei grabbed an extra handful of tissues and held them tightly against his nose.  
  
We don't have to pass gas to amuse ourselves.   
  
Wufei smirked. 'Well Maxwell does,' he thought to himself.  
  
If we forget to shave, no one has to know.   
We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear.   
We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.   
  
Wufei resisted the urge to look down. Instead, he grabbed more tissues.  
  
We have the ability to dress ourselves.  
We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.  
  
Wufei was starting to worry as his tissue supplies were quickly being depleted to stop his increasing nosebleed.   
  
There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.   
We'll never regret piercing our ears.  
We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.  
We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence, because they aren't listening anyway.  
  
'Ah, so that's what the onnas are talking about all day,' Wufei thought as he made a mental note about it. After all, he had just learned one of the great mysteries of the world.  
  
SEND THIS TO FIVE BRIGHT WOMEN YOU KNOW AND MAKE THEIR DAY!!!  
  
Wufei leaned back in his chair and pondered. Now whom could he send this to. Inspiration hit him and he quickly forwarded the mail five times. He sat up in his chair and stretched for a moment.  
  
"This should be interesting," he commented to himself.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~   
Meanwhile.........  
~ ~ ~ ~  
  
"You've got mail!!"  
  
"What the.........!?"  
  
Duo looked at his mailbox with suspicion. Why did he have five forwarded e-mails from Wufei entitled 'Valentine Onna'?  
  
Owari  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
That was certainly a spur of the moment idea. Hey, Wufei had to send it to five female friends of his. Why face the embarrassment of actually sending it to five DIFFERENT females?  
  
Lol, please review. 


End file.
